By Dawn Hepp-Kosma from SimplyGoodEnough.com
It felt like this time would be different
9 year old Henry sat on the curb at the end of his driveway with backpack loaded and boy scout guide in hand. His hands shook with excitement as he turned the pages and marveled at the pictures of the “Camp Trailblazer” brochure. This trip has been promised to him the last 2 years. It just never seemed to work out for him to get there. This time it feels different. His ride should be here any minute.
Henry sat on that curb for almost 2 hours before he finally drug his exhausted and disappointed body back into the house and up to his room. His body appeared lifeless and he had no expression. . And he never said a word to anyone for 2 days.
This wasn’t the first time but for some reason it felt like this time would be different.
He made promises
Janice entered her house and put her keys on the mantle a rush of anger filled her body. She took a deep breathe. Recited her daily mantra “I have so much to be thankful for, this isn’t a big deal”
A half full bowl of Lucky Charms was still sitting on the table. A paper towel lay hanging off dining chair her toddler had occupied this morning. A dead fly carcass was only about a foot away.
Her husband John sat comfortably in his chair reading the paper. The mess on the table remained untouched.
Tears began to fill her eyes but she choked them down and proceeded to clean up the mess. Janice thought marriage and kids would be different. She thought they would be different because John told her they would be different. He made promises to her to be a parent, to be a helpful husband, to be the other adult. He actually told her he would do better every time she asked for his help. It’s just shy of 7 years. But it never changed.
Capacity to reason through the meanings
Semantics define the words we use and teaches us how to use those words. It provides a mean to communicate. Anyone who speaks a language has a truly amazing capacity to reason through the meanings of the sentences as though they are not an unordered heap of words.
Language do not define actions that ARE GOING to happen. Rather describe the actions that CAN happen or have ALREADY happened.
What does this really mean?
This means, we can not predict the future but we can determine the probability of the future through previous experience of individual’s actions.
We can make more calculated judgments based on how others have treated us in the past. Decide if we choose to trust someone who has poor follow through. Be judged upon the value of our own words.
“If your actions don’t live up to your words, you have nothing to say.”
Communication around the world is at an all time high. Smart phones, texting, international calling and internet at every corner of nearly every block. We have more opportunities than ever imagined to share our thoughts and ideas. Yet there seems to be a disconnect as people fail to make good on promises made.
Relationships are failing.
Politicians “forget” about the promises they made as they were voted in.
Marriages fall apart as vows are set by the wayside.
Children build walls to protect themselves from broken promises because mom/dad is “just too busy.”
Words equal expectations
If we set aside our own interpretations of what we want words to mean. We can begin to decipher what we can expect. If our expectations are only of words that have been said. What can go wrong?
It’s that actions that follow those words that carry the meaning.
If you enjoyed this article and would like to find more of Dawn’s content online, visit her at SimplyGoodEnough.com